- Identify the specific fears tied to your inhibitions so you can face them head-on. Each time you face a fear, your inhibitions will gradually lessen.
- Accept and respect yourself as an amazing person with something of value to offer in social situations.
- Use positive affirmations and breathing exercises to help you smile and relax in social situations.
Explore your fears.
Learn why you feel inhibited. Think deeply about your last social interaction (it can help to journal about it). Think about what you were afraid of and why you had that fear. For example, did you feel too self-conscious to mingle? Naming your fears is the first step to overcoming them. All inhibitions are fear-based. For example, you may have a fear of feeling inadequate or not living up to other people's expectations. Remember that your inhibitions were created by you. This is great because it means you have the power to overcome them as well!
Face your fears.
Let go of your inhibitions incrementally. All inhibitions are based on some fear. Think of the word "fear" as an acronym meaning "face everything and rise" or "face everything and recover." Look back at the fears you've identified and make plans to face those fears in a controlled environment. For example, if you're afraid to talk to people of a different gender because of a fear of rejection, you might walk up to someone in the grocery store and compliment their shoes. Everyone loves compliments, so you know they won't reject you. As another example, if you're afraid people will think your favorite hobby is cringe, you might join a group of people who enjoy the same hobby so you can talk about it without fear.
Fall in love with yourself.
Accept and respect yourself for the beautiful person you are. Focus on the positive things about yourself and all the reasons there are to love you. Recognize that when other people criticize you, it's often based on their own insecurities—don't take it personally! People will respect you if you stand your ground and hold true to your own values and beliefs. Think about and look at yourself the same way you look at your best friend. Everyone has flaws, but when you're thinking about someone you love, you don't focus on those flaws. Treat yourself the same way. Remind yourself that other people typically aren't thinking about you (at least, not as much as you think). They're probably also thinking about themselves and their own issues.
Spend time with supportive people.
Surround yourself with friends and family who lift you up. Talk to people you're close to about how you want to be less inhibited and explain what efforts you've made so far to overcome your fears. Let them know that you could use some encouragement in social situations—they'll help you out! Talk to someone sociable and ask if they'd be willing to take you under their wing. They can introduce you to people and pick up the thread of a conversation when it stalls. Mimic the way they act to become more confident yourself.
Repeat positive affirmations to yourself.
Talk to yourself the way you would talk to your best friend. Think about something you would say to encourage your best friend if they told you they were feeling nervous or insecure. Repeat the same sorts of things to yourself. This can help you feel less inhibited in social settings. Can't decide on a phrase to use? Try these affirmations to get started: "I am interesting and worthy of attention." "I have something valuable to contribute to the conversation." "I am worthy of love and respect."
Smile and relax in social situations.
Soothe yourself when uncomfortable feelings arise. There are many ways to self-soothe, and finding something that works for you can take a little trial and error. Try doing deep-breathing exercises to calm your nerves or use movement to shake off the jitters. Sometimes, you've got to just "fake it 'til you make it." For example, you might go to the bathroom or step outside and do a few jumping jacks to release some of your nervous energy. If you have a calm and pleasant demeanor, other people tend to mirror that back. When you smile, the world smiles back at you. Many people turn to alcohol or drugs to help them feel more comfortable in social situations. Avoid leaning on substances—you could develop an unhealthy dependency.
Challenge yourself to try something new.
When you step out of your comfort zone, you expand your horizons. For many people who are shy or inhibited, trying something new is the most difficult thing. Just go slow and admit that you've never done it before and you're feeling awkward. Remember to praise yourself for your effort. Trying and failing in front of other people is a great way to lose your inhibitions. Many inhibitions are based on a fear of failure or a fear of rejection. This is a way to face those fears head-on.
Participate in group activities.
Inhibitions often fade away when you're part of a group. When you're involved in a group activity, you're focused on the goal of the activity and your fears fade into the background. And because you're all focused on the same goal, you don't have to worry about coming up with something to talk about. If you make a mistake, shrug it off or make a joke about it. Being lighthearted will help the people around you lighten up as well. Do you find you get nervous at parties? Try hosting your own! You'll likely feel more comfortable in your own home and you can distract yourself by playing the role of host.
Volunteer for a cause you care about.
Volunteer opportunities give you the chance to open up. You'll typically be less inhibited if you're doing something that you're passionate about. Even better, the people around you will likely share the same passion, so you'll always have something to talk about with them. When you volunteer, let the person in charge know that one of the reasons you want to do this is to practice interacting with people. They can put you in a more social or public-facing position.
Exercise control over your actions.
Losing your inhibitions doesn't mean shrugging off responsibility. The word "inhibition" can have a negative connotation, but not all inhibitions are bad—some keep you from doing something dangerous or irresponsible. You don't want to go overboard and become completely uninhibited. This is why using alcohol or drugs to lose your inhibitions isn't recommended—these substances can cause you to take unhealthy risks. If you think you have a problem with alcohol or drugs, talk to a therapist or other trusted person so you can get the help you need.
Keep track of your progress.
Be self-aware of how you act in social situations. Losing your inhibitions doesn't happen overnight and your progress won't necessarily be linear. By journaling about social situations, you can see your improvement over time and recognize specific areas where you might need more help. If you feel as though you were making progress and then seemed to take a step backward, consider what made that situation different. That can help you figure out what else you need to work on. Sometimes, being excessively inhibited is a sign of a larger issue, such as social anxiety. If you think that's you, talking to a therapist can help.
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