What does “toxica” mean?
“Tóxica” is the Spanish word for “toxic,” meaning “poisonous” or “harmful.” Most nouns in Spanish are gendered, and “tóxica” specifically refers to a toxic female, while “tóxico” would denote a toxic male. A tóxica is typically a woman in a relationship that exhibits irrational and/or combative tendencies. Consider this a warning– you really won’t like a tóxica when she’s angry! “Tóxica” comes from the Latin toxicus meaning “poisoned,” which derives from the Greek toxikon, or “poison for arrows.” Tóxica is a noun, so a person can be a tóxica or present characteristics of a tóxica. Here’s an example of how to use it in a sentence: Them: “She picked a fight with me because I refused to block all the girls I knew on social media.” You: “Wow. She really is a tóxica.”
Traits of a Tóxica
Of Latin America descent. This is the first defining characteristic of a tóxica. If she has no cultural or genetic ties to Latin America, then she is plain-old-English toxic. However, if she is a Latina mami with a “spicy” attitude, she could be considered a tóxica.
Jealous and possessive. Jealousy-fueled rages are often what we think of when we think of classic tóxica behavior. A true tóxica in a relationship will refuse to share her partner with anyone– coworkers, friends, and family included. That’s right, mom, your child belongs to her now, and any attempts at interference could be perceived as fighting words. Spoilers: it never ends well for the other person.
Demanding. Tóxicas believe they can have their cake and eat it, too– along with a five-course meal, wine a-flowing, and don’t you dare forget her two-dozen red roses! Tóxicas believe that it’s up to their spouse to make sure they get their way at all times. And if you fail to live up to a tóxica’s expectations, be afraid. Be very, very afraid.
Fiery temper. Synonymous with many other stereotypes about Latina women, having a “fiery” personality and temper simply comes with the territory. This trait may express itself positively or negatively, as a tóxica is sure to feel the full spectrum of emotion. If you ask a tóxica whether she is a lover or fighter, her answer will be: “Both.”
You Might Be Dating a Tóxica If…
There is a sense of mistrust in the relationship. If your lady friend is always asking to go through your phone, share locations, or is constantly calling when you’re out to catch you in a lie– you might be in danger of dating a tóxica. Mistrust can come in many modern forms, and it’s important to identify how these incidents really make you feel. If you’re doing nothing wrong and still feel like you’re being punished, it might be time to reconsider the relationship.
You feel as if you must walk on eggshells around her. If talking to your girlfriend feels like you’re treading carefully across a field of landmines, she could be a tóxica. Open and honest communication are the pillars of a healthy relationship, so being afraid to express yourself is a huge red flag. Ultimately, living in constant fear that you may trigger an episode of jealousy or anger is no way to live.
Breathing the same air as another woman feels like an infidelity. It’s not that she doesn’t trust you– she just doesn’t trust other women... or you. Female friends are a no-go, as is having any interactions with other women on social media. In fact, if you have to go on a trip without her, and the person on the flight next to you is a woman– you better move. Or: break-up with your tóxica, as asking her to change doesn’t often sound like a viable option.
Your fights get loud. If your neighbors start weighing in on your arguments, it’s not only time to move, but it’s very possible that your significant other is a tóxica. It’s no secret that Latinas are a passionate demographic and show it every chance they get. Most will tell you that it’s embedded in their DNA. Prone to expressing their feelings as loudly as possible in order to really get their points across, tóxicas are not likely to back down in the heat of the moment. Do try to de-escalate the situation but don’t underestimate your opponent. If a tóxica thinks she’s right– it's best not to disagree. Again, a potential course of action might be to cut ties with your tóxica, as these toxic behaviors have no place in healthy, loving relationships.
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