New Delhi: I'm seeing rainbows everywhere lately and cheering it on. For those not upto speed and wondering why everyone is dressing their social media in the vibrant vibgyor although they find it cool or pretty, the symbol my friends is in support of the Supreme Court of the United States of America ruling in favour of gay marriage.
Shakespeare had said, "The world is a stage and we're all its players". How right he was. We all live different roles whether personal, professional, in private, in public and so on. But what happens when we take this a little further ...when we live a life of denial in an attempt to fit in or cover up what we feel society won't accept. We are born into rules and as social animals we are supposed to abide by these.
The scripted way of life has been attempted to be portrayed as correct. What society doesn't understand becomes sinful and taboo. But who created these rules? What makes any one of us better than the other?
We are taught from birth to follow the same norms that some men scripted as acceptable and we adapt and follow those blindly. But what if we're different? Let's say if one were a man who likes the feminine side of life or a Woman who finds herself attracted more to women than to men. How is that any different from being attracted to the opposite gender? And yet we push ourselves and those around us to believe this is abnormal or wrong not helped by the fact that so many priests across religions, spew venom against the very thing religion is supposed to preach - love.
In modern India we still tip toe around the subject, often embarrassed to speak about alternate sexualities. Conveniently we call homosexuality a 'western influence' completely ignoring Indian stories, tales and historical recordings that have been documented for centuries. In this land of the Kamasutra we always accepted those who had sexual choices that differed from what we term conventional today.
India was one land where love was never just about physicality but about the soul. Where our great mythology is filled with stories of gods and various gods taking the female form or stories about transgenders, eunuchs, cross dressers and lesbians. And they weren't judged but rather we celebrated with them.
Very often an attempt is made to brand the word 'homosexual' as a vulgar or abusive term. And the most convenient argument against it is that it is unnatural. But for ever across all cultures through the centuries homosexuality has existed.
And the time is now, for those wrinkling their noses or rolling their eyes, to smell the happy gay flowers because only when we shed the mask of denial can we move ahead as a race & as a society.
If being a homosexual seems different to you then the problem lies in your perception, not in them. Several species display Homosexual behaviour. Ignoring it will not make this go away and sooner than later will people realise that the fraud babas attempting to make a quickie (no pun intended) by proclaiming being gay as a disease or psychological imbalance were the ones in dire need of a treatment. It is a simple personal preference and a natural selection of a mate!
Accepting this will ensure happiness for the individual and in society, cause if one was to force a homosexual man to marry a woman and vice versa under social pressure, they may do it, but will they really be happy? By forcing someone into a relationship they are not meant for, one isn't helping them change or making their future better. Instead what one is doing is forcing them to live a life of dishonesty and making those around them miserable as well. After all the basis of any relationship should be trust and honesty and by forcing someone into a so called 'normal' relationship against their wishes, one is also ruining the life of the partner for no fault of theirs. Does any religion or culture teach us to lie, cheat or ruin an innocent person’s life?
Loving someone of the same gender is not any different from a 'normal relationship '. So then why stifle, suffocate or ridicule something just because it may be a different orientation from ours. It will only come back and haunt us with examples which are seen in society today of double lives, broken marriages, suicides and social stigmas.
In our country where a man has a hard time convincing his family to marry a woman of his choice. I shudder to think of the predicament a gay couple faces. If as a society we as adults can elect a representative or choose a government, then why the ban on choosing a life partner? Should people not have the right to choose who they want to make love to?
Every heterosexual individual must stand by each and every person who wishes to live a real life. A life they were born to live, to love whosoever they want, whether of the same gender or opposite! Let us throw away the mask of ignorance and embrace those who differ from us.
On June 26, 2015 the Supreme Court in USA legalised same sex marriage. At home in India my fiance Tehseen Poonawalla is a petitioner to allow for same sex marriage. But before that our Supreme Court needs to rule on the de-criminalisation of homosexuality.
'Gay rights' still has mixed responses in the Indian society but I hope one day our country can also gift a free colorful and happy verdict in favor of those who have alternate sexual choices and embrace this change as openly as America recently and other countries before it have done . After all it was India that was always an open liberal society that accepted all points of view. Why should the law deny two consenting adults the right to a relationship? Remember the government has no business to be in our bedrooms, no matter what our orientation.
We need to love and respect people for who they are not for what they do in the privacy of their homes. It is that simple and in the end we need to let go of the perceptions we build up because remember....The world is a stage...and we choose the roles we play! "
(Disclaimer: Monicka Vadera is a jewellery designer, animal lover and writes like she cooks from her heart. The article above represents her personal views and is not the stand taken by Network18)
Comments
0 comment